God has gifted human beings with the power to speak. This speaking power leaves humans above all the creatures. All the living beings on this earth can see and hear, but are unable to express their feelings, thereby they are called speechless. Whereas man is rich with the treasure of speech. Our speech reflects our personality. Speech means talk, voice, tongue, language, sound and discourse. By talking we mean exchange of views or a conversation. Every successful person has a unique way of conversation and dialect. It is the charisma of our talks only which, on one hand, attracts hundreds of people, whereas ill words shun people away.
LIVING CONSECRATION
He who is ever content and meditative, self-subjugated and possessed with firm conviction, with mind and heart is dedicated to me. He who is thus consecrated to Me is dear to Me.
Influence of Sweet Words
We can make strangers our friends, by virtue of our sweet tongue, and convert our near and dear our foes, by speaking to them sarcastically. Many a time, it so happens that our own words become a cause of problems for us ourselves.
“Jeebhariya bar bawri, khai gai sarak pataal
Aapunkahi beetar bhai, jutie khat kapaar”
Our tongue is very naughty; it speaks ill and speaks good too. After saying the words it disappears in the mouth but the cheek is rewarded with a slap. Great men rightly state, “Words once spoken and arrow once shot, cannot be taken back or reversed.” Hence we should always be soft-spoken and polite. Only those people are respected in the society who smile very often and always speak melodiously.
The magic of sweet words has its own class, creates its own might, wins over people’s heart and advises every person to love everyone. It is for sure, that whenever we speak in a soft voice, we are bound to speak good, whereas bitter talks are spoken to hurt others and create unfavourable circumstances. God has provided man with an unfailing weapon in the shape of the power of speech. It should always be used in making our voice as sweet as nectar. As far as possible, our endeavour should be to give relief to others, with sweet voice. Many times, it so happens that our bitter words lead to the destruction of a life-long relationship throughout our lifetime. Harsh words should never be spoken because it hurts our feeling. By speaking bitterly, we not only hurt others but at a later stage the agony of harsh words, leads our soul to self-harassment.
Laying emphasis on the importance of a sweet and soft voice, Acharya Mahapragaya has said:
“Some people try to make friends always. Sometimes it so happens that even without any labour, others get attracted. To call others, as their kin is one of the greatest aspirations. People automatically get attracted towards people with high character and morals. People often using foul language; in spite of their best efforts they are not successful in making friends.”
Language and Speech
It was 2 o’ clock in the afternoon. A Buddhist monk, Huang Po, was digging the soil, here and there in search of edible roots, to satisfy his pangs of hunger, for quite sometime, and was not successful.
At that very moment, someone shouted and asked,
“How far is Huang Po monastery?”
Huang Po: “Why do you ask?
Stranger : “I want to attend the sermon of that Buddhist monk. I have come from a far-off place.”
Huang Po : “ He is a fraud. He misguides people.”
Stranger: “But I have walked miles to meet this monk. I shall now attend and then only leave.”
Huang Po: “Go to Hell; it is about two miles from the village in the north direction. Later that evening when the discourse was over, this stranger stood up and asked Huang Po, “Which Po is the right person, the one which I met at noon, or the one which has just finished giving the sermon?” Huang Po replied, “Both.” The former language was that of a hungry person and the latter voice belonged to a satisfied sage or hermit.
Significance of Sweet Speech
“Kaga Kako dhan Hare, Koyal Kako dey,
Methi vani Bol ke, Jag apno Kar leye.”
Everyone is aware that both the crow and the cuckoo are similar in their colour, size and shape, but nobody likes a crow, so much so that even if it sits on a window sill, we all run to shoo him away, whereas a cuckoo is well accepted and loved by everyone. People are very crazy to hear its sweet and melodious voice. For movies, the voice is especially recorded and kept for special occasions, so as to enhance the effect of voice. This difference is just due to speech. Whatever type of language a person uses, the results are accordingly; just like with sweet and polite words, both wealth and friends go on getting attached to you. Similarly, the use of harsh language invites death and destruction. In the construction of our boundaries of personality and what respect and hospitality we get, all depends upon the type of language used. Whenever we use negative and rude language, our victory is converted to a failure, our friends become our foes, and all our happiness and peace turns into a nightmare.
Analysing the importance of speech, Sant Kabir has said:
“Aesi Bani Bolayee Man ka apaa khoye,
Auro ko sheetal kare, Aaphu sheetal Hoye.”
The impact of our personality through our speech leaves a permanent impression on the minds and hearts of people. Many a time, the speech of great personalities becomes a guiding path for others to follow. In other words, the foundation of the entire behaviour of a person depends upon his speech only. Without language, etiquette is not possible.
To sum up, language not only reveals our entire personality and skills, but also provides us with a different new identity. Probably, this is one of the major factors, on account of which guiding and advantages on phrases and words are called ‘austerity’ of language. The entire personality of a person using the austerity of speech glows and smells a fresh rose like fragrance, which everyone wants to adopt and acquire. Lord Krishna also conveyed to Arjuna to use sweet and polite language while preaching the ‘Bhagwad Gita’.
“ Anuduagkar Vakaya Satya Priahit Chayat
Sawadhayamayan chav Vadnmay Tap Uchitey”
—Srimad Bhagwad Gita
Agony of Bitter Words
The mental agony felt by bitter words is far worse than any physical wound. Wounds created by weapons or otherwise can be cared by medication very easily with the passage of time but the wounds created by foul words never heal and often hurt every now and then. Any person who uses foul and rude language, we look forward very eagerly for the very first opportunity to avenge our feeling. Sant Kabir’s saying emphasises on the importance of speech as follows:
“Shabdh Samharya Bolliey,
Shabhdh ke Hath no Paav
Ek Shabdh Aushdhi Kare
Ek shabdh kare ghav.”
One should speak very cautiously and thoughtfully, as the words spoken do not have hands and feet. A few words act to relieve pain, played by bitter words in the battle of the Mahabharata, which resulted in destruction and completely ruining everyone. The bitter words used by queen Draupadi, wife of the Pandavs, for king Dhritrashtra’s son prince Duryodhan, “The blind beget the blind” resulted in destroying the entire family of the Kauravas, along with the lacs of other people and took them into the jaws of death. Bheema did not forget the avenge inflicted upon Duryodhan who invited naked Draupadi on his thighs in a congregation. Sometimes, simply spoken bitter words send an invitation to bad luck and problems. The usage of bitter words should be avoided, as it fouls the mouth-
“Kudrat ko na pasand hai, Sakhti Zubaan Mein,
Paida Hui Na Eesliyae, Haddi Zubaan Mein.”
Bitter words when spoken by a person, not only hurt other people but after sometime he realises and starts repenting on his behaviour. No one should perform such act, wherein he has to remorse later on. Sweet words do not mean that you have to agree to each and every statement of others, nor does it mean that you have to indulge in the flattery of others.
It may be pointed out that flattery and false praise are often done for selfish motives which can be wrong many a time. To fulfil our selfish motive, through flattery does not call in for judiciousness of speech. We should always keep this fundamental Mantras in mind while conversing with others.
“Kinhey Prakrit Jan-Gun-Gana
Sir Dhuni Giraha Lagee Pachitana” —Ramcharit Manas
This usage of sweet and soft words is an art of truth, whereas flattery is the reflection of false beliefs and sayings.
How to Speak, What to Speak
Satyam Bruyat Priyam Brusyaan
Bruyat Satyam Priyam
Priyam cha Nanarityam
Bruyaadesh Dharmay Snatanae
—Manu Smriti-4/138
Always speak the truth; speak sweet and politely but do not speak those words which may be true, but they hurt others’ sentiments, and also those words which may flatter you, but are untrue.
Kinds of speech
The competency of the language should be such that it constitutes the fundamentals of heart, mind, soul and health, whereas incompetent language gives birth to physical and mental problems. According to our ancient scriptures, the usage of religious sermons is called ‘Samyak Yog’, whereas speaking against the preachings and teachings is called ‘Asamayak Yog’.
Samyak Yog : Samyak Yog incorporates those parts of speech which are pleasure-giving, is helpful in doing good to others and oneself and mutually creates an environment of oneness, and love. Samyak Yog prohibits the usage of such words, which create bitterness and which become the cause of the breaking of relations rather than making them stronger. The Samyak Yog establishes the fact that we should hang our speech, according to the circumstances prevailing.
Asamayak Yog : This part of speech incorporates those words, which are not pleasant to hear. Sarcastic comments, demoralizing conversations, untrue talks, bitter comments and spreading of sorrows all form a part of this yog. Such language leads to quarrels, backbiting and enmity.
Many times, it has been observed that a person wants to speak, but keeping in view the circumstances, he speaks just for formality only. This is not advisable. This constitutes the ‘Alap Yog’ of the speech. It gives birth to various misunderstandings in our life.
Principles of Truth
A person who does not hesitate to say correct versions, and knows the art of speaking the truth in a sweet manner, who does not speak the truth bitterly, and also does not tell a sweet lie, one who does not believe in self-appraisal, does not speak against anybody, one who does not believe in self-interest at the cost of others and the person who does not change his decisions, under the pressure of greed, bribe, fear and obstacles, such a personality impresses one and all.
(WHAT DO YOU THINK)
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(YOUR DECISION)
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ACTION PLAN
- What is the effect of sweet words in our lives?
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…………………………………………………………………………………… - What do you mean by sweet speech?
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…………………………………………………………………………………… - What is the effect of bitter words on you?
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…………………………………………………………………………………… - What are the different kinds of speeches?
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…………………………………………………………………………………… - What type of conversation do we like?
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…………………………………………………………………………………… - State any bitter ‘Talk’ that you still remember.
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…………………………………………………………………………………… - What type of personality impresses all?
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