Good manners and aristocracy (politeness) are the two main characteristics of a successful and a progressive society. No nation or civilization has been able to make progress by forgetting her self-respect. Only those people are respected and are appreciated by one and all who are well bred and well mannered among all the classes of the society. We may belong to any class, creed, culture, religion but if we lack the basic courtesies of human culture and civilizations, prosperity and succeess remains far away from us.
VALUE OF LIFE
In any age and in any society, if a question is made to the people living therein : “Are you happy”? most of them will answer, “Yes.” This is because of the existence of certain life values, including the feeling of happiness and worthiness of life which will not change even if time elapses and environment changes. The humble in a poor country value life just as much as the rich of an affluent state.
Be civilized and be well mannered
A civilized and well-mannered person is filled with the bounty of self-respect, whereas wicked and uneducated persons are considered no less than animals. To be successful it is very imperative to follow the rules of etiquette and aristocracy. People who are successful and persons, who want to become successful, should follow one and only one golden rule, i.e. to increase the qualities of humanity. Howsoever a man or a woman may be qualified or educated, unless he/she is in possession of human values/self-respect, he is the most impoverished person living on this earth.
A famous writer J.Maurya writes in one of his memories that sometimes when he used to visit a slum he came across an old lady who lived alone in a neat and clean hut, in spite of being surrounded by dirt and filth. Out of curiosity, the writer asked the old woman how she lived so neat and clean in that slum surrounded by dirt. She replied, “It is a matter of self-respect.” There was pride and confidence in her voice. It is quite evident that while living under despair and polluted conditions, she was able to find a way to keep her esteem high. Physically, she was living in a dirty and dingy place,but mentally she was above all these conditions.
When the seeds of civilization and culture germinate in people, the fragrance of these qualities spreads in the atmosphere abundantly. Educated and cultured civilization has the ability to accept discipline and the government. For healthy sound mental ability both these elements are necessary. It does not mean a sort of dependency, but it is a kind of feeling of responsibility towards the government. It is rightly said:
“baa adab, ba naseeb.
bey adab, Bey naseeb”
Accept Your Good Qualities
“When I was a young lad, I realised that out of ten pieces of work undertaken, I failed in nine. I did not want to be unsuccessful; hence, I started putting in ten times more labour into my work.”
—George Bernard Shaw
Educated and well-bred persons have the quality to accept the goodness of others. The life of every individual is equally important and valuable as that of others.
In the words of the renowned judge Dostovasky, “Every person among us is responsible to every other person for each and every thing.” In order to be a good citizen we should be well disciplined during childhood. The most important duty in our social life is not to praise the unworthy people, but it is equally important to support and praise the deserving persons openly. In other words, it can also be said, “Never delay in praising a person but think twice before speaking ill of others.” If we apply this formula in our life, we will be surprised to see its results, in our social and family life.
According to Sydney Smith— “Popularity and respect is a reward itself, for which the person strives and struggles for. In comparison to wealth, fame gives multiple rewards and also birth to the mental abilities. It is also a stamp of personality and it is one of the important basic duties to perform it with honesty and dedication.
“Man is not an animal as he knows how to talk. He is not only capable of hiding his foolishness, but competent enough to cover his sins, with the help of the gift of gab.By artificially increasing his gross necessities, this two-footed human being is able to save himslf from being an animal.”
— Jai Shankar Prasad
One of the leading writers of Italy named Garfield was once asked during his childhood, as to what he would like to become. He replied, “Firstly, I would like to become a human being, and should I not be successful in becoming one, I will not succeed in any task I may undertake.”
Develop Your Humanity
Once a king questioned his prince about a commodity which although is in abundance but still is in dearth. The prince replied, “That is ‘Humans’, as there are lacs of men in the world, but it is extremely difficult to find a real human being.”
According to an American writer, Emerson, “Of the thousand experiences of life only a few experiencs are appreciable. Every human being is made up of five elements, namely air, water, fire, soil and space, besides having ears, eyes, nose, hands and feet but the best being is the one who is neither down-trodden nor proud and haughty. People with high esteem are born with their predestined fortune.”
The Greek philosopher, Geogenium, used to wander in the streets of Athens with a lantern in his hand in broad daylight in search of an honest person but was unsuccessful in his venture. One day, he cried to the people of Athens to listen to him. A large gathering surrounded him. On seeing this he despisedly asked that he had called in for human beings and not for pigmies. The situation is existing today also when we see advertisement columns of the leading newspapers, magazines publish in the situation vacant columns, demanding for “wanted a man.”
Now the question arises as to what kind a person is needed if a person made of five elements and physically fit is required. Any one can do the job and there is no dearth of them. The world’s population is increasing day by day despite lacs of people dying of cancer, war, AIDS, earthquakes and other calamities but still no sign appears of population control. India has crossed a hundred million mark in the beginning of the twenty-first century; still, the requisite person has not been sighted.
Extraordinary Personality
In fact, the person required be of such an extraordinary personality, capable of distinguishing himself in the crowd, capable of expressing his viewpoints fearlessly and ability to say, ‘No’ when others are yearning to say, ‘Yes’. That extraordinary personality is required, which in spite of being inspired by a certain sect, class, should not allow his humanitarian powers to be reduced or weakened. That personality who does not allow his other power to get destroyed, while extending his special powers, is able to accomplish his day-to-day work with the same precision and ease, of utmost importance, and not only considers his profession as the means of self-development and livelihood, but also the development of humanity, society, character at large. Thousands of companies, businessmen, landlords, factories, tradesmen, multinationals, colleges, daily publish advertisements in the leading newspapers, magazines, demanding suitable persons for specific jobs. This is a living proof of the fact that even today in the crowd of thousands, the demand for experts and qualified persons exists everywhere. All the riches of this world, viz places, cars, aeroplanes and ownership of various organisations are of no value in front of the purity of mind and soul. Not to harm others and to keep purity of mind and body, continually upgrading our thoughts and character are such qualities which make a human being a complete extraordinary person. A person who is honest but remains ill; educated but unable to conquer his anger; earns good wages, but is under debts; holds a high position but belives in flattery, is incomplete. Unless a group of well-deserving persons is not formulated, all the leading publications and magazines will keep carrying the advertisement of “wanted a man.”
Even if a person is appointed to a post of his ability and suitable recommendation, he may be thrown out on the charges of bribery, or on being a lazy person sitting at home, or an expulsion on account of disobedience, or on account of bad health and bad behaviour, or gets disappointed and stay home. The advertisement of “wanted a suitable person” will keep on appearing in daily publications on regular basis.
You are the supreme creation in this world as a human being, with all the power to face the adverse circumstances at all odd times, with all your mental and moral and physical strenghts. Thus, you should not become a slave to any circumstances or environment. You are developed to transform the unfavourable conditions to your favour. God has endowed us with a sense of duty, and under such circumstances you are to develop and improve your qualities to be successful. Although we are all aware of the fact that no work is accomplished without any reason yet the first and foremost is our mental inspiration, which helps us to perform our work. This inspiration or mental power creates atmosphere of success awareness. However, if we are stressed and lethargic, it takes no time to build an unsuccessful environment around us. Thus it clearly indicates that success and failures totally depend upon our mental status; nor the results of our accomplishments can go against our stream of thoughts under any circumstances. Our nature, our habits, our thoughts and motives-all of them are the images of our ideas and they have an everlasting impact on our activities.
Keep in Mind
- “First impression is the last impression.” Hence we should be cautious and careful whenever we are meeting or writing, attending lectures, etc. for the first time. As it is rightly pointed, “The first impression is the last impression.
- No person is a complete personality. But every person has a special quality. Thus a person should always endeavour to increase his qualities.
- Take care of minutes; the hours will take care of themselves.
- Our shortcomings are the indication of our destruction.
- He who makes his today successful, his life and his future are fully secured and a person who makes his today unsuccessful, his life and future is also a failure. Tomorrow becomes today and a group of tomorrows leads to unlimited future.
Principles of Truth
“ Those men who remain with pride and haughtiness, consider no one of any value, speak ill and vulgar language, supporting the wrongs, losing their temper on petty matters, feel insulted to listen and agree to other proposals. Such people are never liked by anyone, anywhere.”
(WHAT DO YOU THINK)
(YOUR DECISION)
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ACTION PLAN
- What do you mean by civilization and mannerisms?
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…………………………………………………………………………………….. - Which type of men are called civilized and cultured?
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…………………………………………………………………………………….. - Give the reason of being uncivilized?
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…………………………………………………………………………………….. - What type of people are not liked anywhere?
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…………………………………………………………………………………….. - What do you understand by individual qualities?
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…………………………………………………………………………………….. - Explain in detail the qualities of a complete man.
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…………………………………………………………………………………….. - Which type of personality impresses you the most?
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